Sometimes you have presented your arguments, told great stories, appealed to emotions, and explained your logic, but somebody is still unconvinced. Now what? In episode 60 of Magic in the Room, Luke, Hannah, and Chris discuss strategies for managing team members who are particularly stubborn. Asking them the right questions, framing, and giving people authority may convince the unpersuadable, but leaders also need to set boundaries or remove someone from the team if they are unwilling to change.
In the last episode, your hosts completed their unlocking EQ series by exploring the topic of persuasion. They discussed how to persuade people and help get them over that hump to believe things differently and change their behavior. But what they didn't talk about was the flip side of the coin: how do you persuade the unpersuaded? So, they sat back down to record today's bonus episode and revisit the subject of persuasion.
In an article for the Harvard Business Review, Adam Grant shared a case study about Steve Jobs called, Persuading the Unpersuadable. The renowned organizational development and organizational psychologist talked about the people around Jobs and his team. He explored how they persuaded someone who had a reputation for being an ego-driven visionary but not the easiest person to work with. These people were challenged with persuading Steve Jobs to do things that eventually led to the iPhone, Apple TV, and other things that weren't really on his roadmap.
Luke shares some of the key principles and takeaways from the article, which begins with letting the know it all in the room explain their way of doing things. When Luke encounters someone who is consistently resisting where the group's going. He tries to defuse the situation by simply asking them, "What's your alternative?" Sometimes, when you let people run with something, they discover the flaws in their ideas. In some cases, they even end up proving their incompetence or learn the problems with their own vision.
Chris shares his experiences and how persuadable people will often have a fixed inward mindset. They are usually very passionate and rely on their intuition. Chris believes that it's essential to give space to people and take the time to develop a sense of understanding around where they're coming from and how the person arrived at where they are.
By contrast, Hannah has had the opposite experience where some will shut down and say you are wrong. Some will only listen to logic and facts, which they have already manipulated in a certain way, and they can't be convinced otherwise because these are the facts. They will not listen or respond positively to intuition or emotion because they don't trust it.
Hannah shares how a common denominator to a certain level of stubbornness can come from a place of fear. They could think if they allow someone to persuade them, they will display signs of weakness or fear someone is taking advantage of them. Chris also talks about how sometimes, as a leader, you need to accept that tigers don't change their stripes.
We all have and persuadable people in our lives. If you have someone on your team that you want to talk about or explore what performance management looks like with someone like this, we would love to hear from you. Luke, Hannah, and Chris invite you to share your experiences by emailing them at info@purposeandperformancegroup.com. Remember, if you fill out the listener survey, you can also get a free Magic in the Room hat by simply going to www.magicintheroom.com.